Friday, April 1, 2011

Bleakness in Summer...

A year ago, I was under the impression that nothing could be bleaker than the endless winters of Cleveland, Ohio. The bitter cold and grayed out sunless skies that would last for days together gave you this eerie feeling of being buried alive. Until today...
The doctor tells me that my problem is inability to adjust to this climate as the temperature's steadily soaring...he gave me more medications and advised me to take it slow, stay home, drown myself in drinks (the non-alcoholic kind!) inside and out and stay out of the sun...
So, essentially he is telling me I am going into a decline because of the heat and I need to spend the next how many ever days mollycoddling myself...if that means till the end of summer I am dead...From the endless winters of Cleveland to the endless summers of Ahmedabad...What a life!! Be careful what you wish for dearies, all that wishing for sunshine that I indulged in over the last few years in the US has been granted me with one big bang right now and boy does it hurt!!
So the next few months I am scheduled to stay home...and do what else? Read myself blind I suppose! I felt buried alive in Cleveland but I am truly buried alive here...Hmmmm maybe it's time for me to get out of here....Can't believe that the land I grew up in is turning against me with a vengeance...sighhh....

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Polyandry Advocacy Club Anybody?

...Shocked? Scandalized? Read on Dahlings!!

In my previous post, I moaned n groaned about a possible typhoid relapse. After waiting out the mandatory 48 hours with my fever showing no sign of loving me any less, we went back to the doctor today...I was expecting a typhoid relapse verdict and was all set to work on kicking the little bugs(gers) out of my system again and the doc states it doesn't look like typhoid...it's probably something else!! So after shelling out some more bodily fluids for some more tests we came back home...results will be out in the evening.

Anyways, to get back to my point...

I spent the past couple days home alone alternately starving my fever and throwing things at it (read pills) as DH had to go out of town on business. Yes...my illnesses dare not be an excuse for him to cancel his plans anymore as they are too much and too frequent...after all somebody's got to pay my medical bills! And make sure we don't end up homeless, which if left to me seems to be a distinct possibility! The cook and the maid can do all I need and my books have always given me awesome company. However, none of these can be a real substitute for your husband or wife...so you see where I am going with this?

By the time DH came back home, I was ready to do some gentle in home socializing with an actual human being...which means, I would lie on the couch like a pathetic little sickie, DH would sit beside me holding my hand and engage me in gentle low voiced conversation on mellow topics perfectly suited to an invalid. 

The reality? This pathetic little sickie is on the couch clutching her kindle while DH is sitting beside me clunking away on his laptop...which he has been doing ever since he came home yesterday ( he calls it "follow up" work...after that he needs to focus on "move forward" work). ?????? WHAT am I supposed to do??? SO, I decided to take a stand to ensure my wellbeing as well...the solution?

I will take a lesson from ancient history...(Nothing new eh? We Indians are so fond of referring back to our glorious history and culture every chance we get)...Heck! my life needs a new purpose outside of exploring the wonderful world of tropical diseases...I will go back to the Mahabharata and emulate my dear Draupadi (will also ignore the teensy weensy fact that she ended up with five husbands by mistake!) I will begin Polyandry Advocacy.

The first step is to walk the talk...so I informed DH I need a second spouse, quite definitely unemployed and DH can have the privilege of supporting us both! DH reaction...Thunder and Hailstorm!!...Fireworks, Verbal Bombs, copious tears and going down on his knees to beg my pardon....ah! how sweet is fantasy....REALITY - flying kiss aimed somewhere over my right shoulder which went right out the large windows behind me and even louder clunking! And Horror of horrors! One hand is reaching out for his "out of body mouth and brain"...his cell phone...fizzle...phish...whimper.... whimper...

Any supportive voices out there? Anyone interested in joining me to form a Polyandry Advocacy club?....     (Most definitely not interested in helping form a Polygamy Advocacy Club...yeah yeah I am happily unfair)

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